You do not have an inalienable right to feel comfortable
Previously posted on Cohost (RIP)
People do not have an inalienable right to be comfortable. Being made to feel discomfort is not, in itself, justification for attacking someone.
This is something that white folks in particular, and (in some ways especially) including white folks who belong to marginalized groups really need to wrap their head around, especially in the context of creating safe and healthy communities online.
There is a difference between safe spaces, which you do have a right to, and comfortable spaces, which you do not. You do not have a right to be insulated from anything that could make you feel doubt or anxiety. You do not have a right to be free of all gazes which you perceive as judging you. You do not have a right not to be asked to do better. You do not have a right not to be exposed to the experiences of others.
This is especially true when what’s at issue is someone else’s actual rights.
There’s a real strong pattern of folks carving out what they consider to be safe spaces for themselves and then reacting with sometimes shocking vitriol to anyone in those spaces who doesn’t make them feel good about themselves.
That pattern is what underpins the toxic whiteness of places like Mastodon, and it’s definitely here too, which is a real bummer.
I don’t expect everyone to be a perfectly virtuous paragon of social justice. You don’t have to be free of sin. I’m certainly not. But when something makes you feel bad you should stop and think for a second before trying to purge it like an immune system on overdrive.